Midnight Negotiations

A fight broke out in my neighbourhood somewhere around 1.30 am this morning. It was over a woman. After some confusion, kicking and pushing, two boys were separated.

“Okay, you can both sleep next to me” the woman was heard to have said “I’ll lay in the middle, you can each have a side.”

“What about if I have her for one hour and then you can have her for one hour?” The eldest was tying to negotiate.

The woman rolled over and decided they could fight until death, she was too tired and it was only a few hours until she needed to be up to walk the beagle. The beagle (she would discover later) was downstairs enjoying a plate of Schnitzels it had recovered from the refrigerator. A small person had neglected to close the refrigerator door properly last night, this meant the beagle enjoyed a tub of butter, a plate of schnitzels and half a tub of yoghurt. Listening to all that arguing had obviously made the beagle hungry.

G gets home on Saturday, I will return to just the one 6ft 2 man in the bed, rather than the continual flow of foot traffic that is the norm while he’s away. One day they’ll stop coming, and I’ll be sad. In the meantime I’ll continue to walk around with a crook in my neck and the outline of a small foot print on my bum cheek.

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