The Missing Piece

I keep feeling like I’m missing something. Like there’s a piece of the puzzle that’s fallen under the table and I haven’t noticed. That one day I’ll be wandering past and I’ll see that the piece is right there, camouflaged in the berber, and it’ll make sense. It will click. Oh, I get it! That’s why gay couples can’t legally marry. Now I understand.

I’m waiting for someone to explain the technicality, the legal ramifications, the money it would cost the government to change. I mean there has to be more to it, right?

Surely if we can now recognize and openly discuss that our community is a mix of both gay and straight soldiers, nurses, teachers, doctors, farmers, lawyers, hairdressers and politicians  – we can also now accept that everyone in the community has equal rights.

For the longest time I assumed it was because Australia was being run by a conservative government. And then the government changed. I figured things would change in time, and as a heterosexual married mother of four, I have to admit I was complacent. I mean, it didn’t mean anything to me, it wasn’t going to change my life at all.

And then I realized that was the missing piece.

It was the complacency.

My very clever Aunty put it this way “this is not a matter of opinion, this is a matter of human rights”.

Penny Wong showed incredible dignity when the issue was raised on the ABC’s ‘Q and A’ recently. How would you react to a colleague telling you that he felt that you weren’t providing “the very best circumstance” for your children?

“Is it hurtful?”

“Of course it is – but I know what my family’s worth”

Watch her face, see her wince. Yes. It’s hurtful.

I was interested in what the little travelers thoughts were on marriage equality and what they felt would be the very best circumstance to be raised. They were all surprised to hear that you couldn’t get married in Australia if you were gay “but you can in Calgary?” said one of them.

I asked what they would prefer, two Mummies, two Daddies, or a Mummy and a Daddy. The second little traveler rolled her eyes in a stop wasting my time kind of way. “You wouldn’t care would you, because you would want whatever you were born with, because they were the people that chose you”.

Couldn’t have said it better myself.

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